Sunday, December 14, 2008

My Holiday Rant

(bonus points for anyone who can find all the Canadian-isms in my rant)

"It’s the holidays; I’ll start fresh in January."

How many times have you said this?

Being a trainer, I’ve heard this more times than I can count.

There was a time in my life where even I used to say it too.

The calendar is chock full of ‘excuse opportunities’ as I like to call them. The big one, of course, is the Christmas holidays. After all, with all the goodies around, you couldn’t possibly not indulge, could you?

You know, if it was only the Christmas holidays that were the problem, then it wouldn’t really be that much of a problem. After all, what’s a couple weeks out of the year to forget about your exercise and nutrition, and just do whatever you feel like for a change? No big deal right?

I’ve often told clients that there is no difference between 100% and 90% when it comes to your diet and exercise plan. What I mean by that, is if you eat clean and stick to your exercise plan 90% of the time, your results are going to be pretty much the same as if you were 100% spot on; there really is no need for perfection is there?
Problem is, most people blow this 10% “free time” before they even get the year started.

And that is the start of the perpetual excuse cycle...

The goodies start flowing in December. Christmas parties, office parties, relatives and friends showing up at a moments notice; seems like everyone who comes to your door is carrying a plate of cookies, or Christmas baking of some sort. No hope even trying to fight it right, so what’s the big deal giving in for a month? After all, it’s just a month right? You’ll start back at it in January with a newly instilled sense of determination. Right! Okay, so now you can relax until the new year.

New years eve rolls around, and you party a little too hard. New years day is spent recovering from the night before, and of course we all know how greasy foods seem to cure a hangover right? So much for starting your new diet and exercise plan January 1st. Besides, there’s still so many goodies lying around left over from the holidays and the new years party, and in your condition you’re not likely to be heading to a gym anytime soon. You‘ll need a week to get back to work and get into a routine anyway, so you’ll start next week.

February rolls around, and you managed to get a couple solid weeks in at the gym, but it’s been a rocky start. Valentines day is here though, and the chocolate is a calling. You have a nice calorie ridden dinner with your significant other, and of course, a decadent dessert. So much for this week. Besides, you can’t NOT eat those chocolates you got right? That would be rude. You take a couple days to consume all the goodies, and you don’t feel like going to the gym because you're so bloated and sickly feeling from all the sweets, so you’ll get back at it next week.

Finally it’s March, and spring is just around the corner! Uh oh! That means summer is on the way too! Better buckle down or you’re going to be avoiding the beach AGAIN this year. Nothing worse than feeling fat and bloated and trying on bathing suits. But, then again, there is still snow on the ground, you’ve got time, no need to panic. But you should start thinking about putting some use to that gym membership you bought back in January.

April arrives, and you maybe got another solid week or two at the gym, but then Easter hits, and the stores are stocking their shelves with chocolate bunnies, chocolate eggs, and other nice goodies. You find yourself unable to resist the temptation, yet again. Chocolate is just too damn good, but after this, that’s it! And you mean it too!

Spring is now in full effect, and now May long weekend is here. The official start to the camping season, (and drinking season). You might go camping, you might stay at home, but either way, it’s a holiday and time to celebrate. Bring on the chips, hot dogs, and beer!

Oh no! June is here already!? Okay, time to get serious now. Summer crept up on you again, how does it always do that? If you really push hard, and I mean REALLY hard, you might be able to feel a little better about your body for August. At least you’ll get one month of summer time fun with a half-decent body right? And September is still summery anyway right?

July hits, and the heat is on, literally. It’s getting harder to go to the gym in this 35+ degree weather. You simply can’t go for your after work run anymore because it’s just too hot. Oh, but guess what? It’s Canada day long-weekend! Let’s have a barbecue at the lake! That’s what summer is all about right? Going to the beach, camping, barbecues, boating, cold drinks. You work hard all year to get to the summer, you’re not going to not enjoy it right?

August is a complete write-off. It’s too hot to work-out, there is a barbecue every weekend, the kids are at home and you’re trying to keep them busy, and then you have your holidays coming up too. Oh well, so much for this summer. Next year will be different. NO! Forget I said that, you’re not going to wait until next year. September is right around the corner, and the kids will be back in school, the weather will be better, and you’ll be back at work and in a routine. September it is then, so just relax and enjoy the rest of your summer and you’ll start fresh next month.

It took a couple weeks to get the kids into their routines and get settled back at work, but now that you are half way through September conditions are perfect to get serious about your diet and exercise again. You might even take a trip somewhere warm this coming winter, so you’ll want to be in your best shape for the beach. Okay, down to business now!

October brings the beautiful colors of the fall, and the weather is perfect for exercising, and you are starting to get a little momentum with your diet over the last couple weeks. It hasn’t been perfect, but it’s certainly better than the month before. But here comes Thanksgiving and what is Thanksgiving without the feast? Turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, pumpkin pie, mmmmm. Sounds good doesn’t it? Okay, after this, things are going to get serious.

Oh shoot, forgot about Halloween. All that candy lying around… is gotta go somewhere. All right, after this THAT IT!

Now that November is here, you are really treading on thin ice. That holiday to Mexico is coming up just after Christmas, so you’ve got less than two months to make some serious headway with your body just to get BACK to where you were last November. After all those indulgences over the past year, and your inability to stick to your exercise program for longer than a couple weeks at best, you’ve actually put on 10 lbs since last year. That means that you’ll have to lose at least 20 lbs to look a little bit better than you did last year. Oh man, where does the year go? You might be in trouble if you can’t get it together in the next couple weeks.

Ahhhh ta hell with it! It’s December, and who are you kidding…. Christmas parties, office parties, relatives and friends showing up at a moments notice…Wait a minute. Why do I have this feeling of Déjà Vu?

Does all this sound familiar?

Stop making excuses, and STOP PUTTING IT OFF!!

If you don’t make NOW the time to get in shape, then when will you?

Stop saying tomorrow, because tomorrow never comes.

Let me make something perfectly clear. The only reason that you don’t have the body you want, the ONLY reason…. because you haven’t made it a priority.

It’s not because of genetics...

It’s not because you were dealt a bad hand...

It’s not because your mother has large thighs so you are doomed to have large thighs...

It is because you’ve put everything else ahead of yourself.


You must take responsibility for your body. It is the way it is because YOU made it that way, good or bad.

Do NOT wait until January.

If you do, you seriously run the risk of ending up in the exact same position you are now….

…except maybe 10 pounds heavier



2sweet said...

Rant? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO just the truth it's how I became HUGE! I haven't broken my diet if you will and I still have about 40 pounds to lose. I refuse to let some tasty food that will be gone from my mouth in seconds and stay on my body for months pass my these lips. One can have a great time and not blow all the hard and I mean hard work you have put into looking great and feel better.
Thank you Rylan for your words they help tremendously. Now go kiss your wife.

Silvia. ;)